long time, no see

fact: I've been ridiculously busy and have pretty much entirely neglected this blog. my bad!

Updates from the last time I posted:
-I went to Snowbird! If you want a better description of what Snowbird Wilderness Outfitters is, other than "The best stinkin' camp in the world!" as I would say, you should go here:
-I went tons of other places: Tallahassee to visit the sister and brother-in-law
Family picture time!


Orange Beach and Biloxi with my mom for business trips:
Mom and I picture time!


-I didn't have a computer for about a month, due to the fact that yet another laptop charger bit the dust (yeah, me and technology don't get along, unfortunately)

-I started my senior year. Which has been insanely fun and insanely exhausting all at once. These days, if it doesn't have to do with AP Chemistry or Trigonometry, I don't have a whole lot of time to think about it. Seriously. In the first month of school, we've already done two labs (labs = death) and two posters (posters = slightly less painful death, but death nonetheless).

-Oh yeah, and I hung out with this goober a whole lot, and by "a whole lot" I mean all the time:


All in all? Best summer ever. Life's pretty darn great, as of late. :)

look at this baby!

It takes a lot to make me go "awww!", being as I'm not the squishy, warm and fuzzy type person. But this video kinda makes me do that, and it kinda makes me want a baby, which I thought was previously impossible. I mean, not enough to seriously make it a life goal, but enough to make me consider it for a minute or two.

...

and then say NOPE! :)
Sorry, Mom. You want grandkids? Talk to your other daughter, who is actually married and not 16, I might add.

this town ain't big enough for the two of us ... literally

There are a couple things I like about living in small-town Mississippi. Granted, not that many, but some, nonetheless.
One of the more annoying of them, though, is that it's kinda hard to avoid people.

My best friend invited me to go hang out with her, her sister, and a few other people.

Little did I know, these "few other people" happened to include a certain ex-boyfriend of mine who I'm not on the best terms with (She didn't know either, just for the record. No crimes committed on her part).

So there I am bowling, eating, and just being within close proximity to this guy who, most of the time, I just wanted to kick really, really hard.

Granted, it wasn't nearly as bad as it could have been. Separate vehicles were taken, different lanes were bowled on. But still, being within ten feet of someone who you used to have feelings for and then were very hurt by is but one thing: AWKWARD.

And if you're wondering, no, we didn't speak to each other. We both did a pretty darn good job of pretending the other wasn't there. :|

Oh well. It was still fun. And I'm a horrible, horrible bowler, haha.

one of the best weekends of my life

was last weekend, bar none.
I've done lots and lots of Lay Renewals in my ten year-ish span of being a team member, but this one that took place last weekend has to be my favorite.
Why? I got the opportunity to worship and have an amazing time with the coolest, most amazing friend in the entire world.
Rachel was able to go with us, and we both had the best time praising and serving and spreading the Word. :)

Another really awesome thing was that I got to be a part of this:



Okay, so not that particular service, but we did the same thing. I can't watch it being done without getting major chill bumps, and it feels so cool to say that I was a part of that. (In case you're wondering, I painted a hand!)

It was pretty much awesome. :)

so, as is often the case in life, I have good news and bad

Bad news: I went back to the doctor today and received yet another steroid shot and one major side effect of those is that it makes it very hard to sleep at night. Thus here I am, not a bit sleepy, and I have to make the fearful journey back to school (and yes, I am an absolute wimp and am terrified) in just a few hours. Bah humbug.

Good news: I'm almost completely better! I can hear again, out of my left ear anyway, and I hardly have any pain left in my right ear, even though it's still pretty swollen down in there. I'm thinking that in just a couple more days, I'll be back to my old spunky self. ;) I know everyone's excited, ha.

Today was the first day I really felt myself in a week. I took a nice shower, took extra time with the hair and make up and enjoyed spending some time with my mom shopping and just goofing off after my doctor visit. I even went walking at the track for a while since it was just so pretty.

Which was a good idea...at first.

The walk and being outside was great. The fact that there was a baseball game and tons of people there? ...not so much.

Here's a secret about me: I'm deathly afraid of people. No, really. Like some people have an irrational fear of ...I don't know, cotton balls or grape juice. I'm just afraid of people.

You know that person in social situations (really? social situations? how old am I?!) who's just standing there awkwardly and uncomfortably pretending that the floor or their shoes or their phone is the most fascinating thing in the world that they must stare at and/or fiddle with?

That's me.

Walking laps past many, many people I know but don't know well enough to talk to may not sound that scary, but for me it's darn near a source for panic.

It's not even that I'm particularly shy! Trust me, ask anyone I'm close to, and they'll tell you that's NOT the case. I'm incredibly fun and outgoing as soon as I've gotten comfortable with someone. Until then, however, I'm closed off like a jar of jelly that's set up out in the hot cellar for a little too long.

I don't know how good of an analogy that is, so forgive me if it's a little, well, stupid.

So be nice to that awkward person. Believe me, they'll appreciate it. Most of the time, they want to be friendly, they just don't know how to do so.

This is only about 1/4 what the title said it'd be about.

Boy, can I digress or what? Ha! :)

you never know what you got 'till it's gone

I would really, really love to listen to music right now.

Like, it's one of my favorite things to do, but I've never really appreciated it (or my hearing in general, for that matter) until now that I can't do it.

Why's that, you might ask?

I have an ear infection - actually, make that two. One in each ear.

If you're thinking ouch, you're on the right track, but the proper way to describe it uses a lot of profanity and just all out inappropriateness, and I'm just not okay with that, so I'll keep it to myself.

So I went to the doctor today to get it all checked out after quite possibly the most miserable night of my life last night, and I came home blubbering like a baby after having two little white twig looking things, aka wicks, shoved wayyy down in my ear in order for the drops I've been using to actually get down in my ear. They couldn't, as it were, because my ear was so swollen, to quote the doctor, I "may as well have been pouring them in the floor." (p.s. I was not a fan of this doctor - a. because he was kind of a smart aleck, and not in the way I can appreciate; no, he was rude; and b. try having something shoved down in your ear when they're already ridiculously sore. yeah, it's not fun)

The point is: I can't hear that great to begin with, but now with these little thingys down in there, I can hardly hear at all. Try having a legitimate, face-to-face conversation with me right now, and I assure you, it probably wouldn't end well.

So basically, I probably could listen to my iPod right now, but the volume would more than likely have to be turned all the way up, and considering the current state of my ears, I'd hate to cause any further damage.

So yeah, it's 2:45 AM right now, and the Loritab they gave me for pain is starting to kick in and make me a little loopy, so I'm gonna try and get some sleep. Good night, all.

I'm addicted to these things

They're seriously like little peanut buttery balls of heaven. Not to mention the fact that they're about as addictive as crack.

AAAAAAND they're only a dollar at Wal-Mart, so I have to grab a box every time I go, of course. They're pretty much stinkin' amazing. :)

facebook frustration

For those that don't know, I really, really, really hate facebook. I mean, really. I really do. I hate it.

It's legitimately like 95% ridiculous and annoying and drama inducing, 5% decent.

I wouldn't mind it as much if people weren't constantly shouting "I NEED STUFF TO BUILD MY FARM: SEND ME 1500 BOARDS, 18,000 COWS, AND 600 HAMMERS. K THANKS!!!!!!!!!!!!" or something along those lines or if people didn't take it so darn seriously.

What do I mean? Here's a little lesson for all of those who were unaware: removing someone from your facebook friends' list is not the equivalent to removing them from your life.

Some people in my life need to take a firm grasp of this concept. :)

I'm not annoyed at all, in case that isn't painfully obvious.

Grrr >:(

these are 100% real

conversations from my everyday life

"Spell check is trying to change this to 'patsies'"

"What the heck is a patsy?"

"I don't know. Let's google it."

-google, google, google-

"'Someone who is ridiculed and blamed for things. A scapegoat.' Dude, I'm a patsy!"

"You're a goat! -laugh-"

"Probably. Did you know my name means female sheep, or something like that?"

"Man.. Goats, sheep. Maybe God's calling on your life is to be a farmer."

"...or a farm animal."

"There was another earthquake?!"

"For real?! Where?"

"Turkey, apparently"

"Man, this is gettin' kinda scary"

"Yeah, it is."

"Earthquakes all the time.."

"Man, I know it."

"Better hold on to your ...land"

"It's kinda dumb that I even bought these shoes, though, now that I'm not running."

"Well, I don't know. I mean, you can still run in them."

"Yeah, true, I guess."

"Plus, it could be worse."

"How could it be worse?"

"You could be an astronaut."

"...what?"

"Ya know, you could be an astronaut and go out and buy a space suit and stuff and then end up not doing it, and then you bought the space suit for nothing! You really can't just use a space suit."

"Uh yeah, because you can obviously just go buy a space suit."

"Dude, you totally can."

"Where?"

"...Space Suits 'R Us?"

"My mom's making cupcakes right now for Jamie's birthday party tomorrow. It makes me want a mcdouble."

"There's a connection there, I know there has to be.."

"Nah, I'm just thinking about how good a mcdouble would be right now."

"The way your mind works never ceases to impress me."

"It's the ADD. Makes for a fun time anyway."

laughter is the best medicine, right? :)

so..I'm pretty stinkin' blessed

it's so funny when God takes you places.

as in, when He's driving you somewhere (not literally, of course, because that'd have to be a pretty darn big car. I mean, I'm no theological genius, but from my understanding, God's kinda ginormous) and along the way you're thinking "oh man, this is scary," but then you get there, and it's just beautiful and you wonder why you were ever scared in the first place. Yeah, that.

Six months ago, I never would have thought that I'd trade in an old best friend (and that term is used very loosely since the person in question wasn't that great anyway) for a new one, who not only is an amazing friend, she's become my new accountability partner, as well. I've never met someone I could talk so openly about spiritual matters with, even if that does take two and a half hours, whilst the ever friendly workers of Mi Pueblo are giving us dirty looks for hogging their table. :)

So yeah, I've been pretty humbled today. And blessed. Humbled, blessed, and happy.

"The Future Freaks Me Out"

Me too, Motion City Soundtrack, me too.

I know most people would look at me, a sixteen year old with her whole life spread out in front of her, and consider me insane for being so freaked out by what may or may not lie ahead, but let it be said, I am. These days, there's tremendous amounts of pressure on teenagers: you have to take the right classes and make the right scores on the ACT or SAT, in order to get into the right college, in order to get the right job, in order to not miss out on the opportunities in life. (I pretty much feel the same way Craig did in It's Kind of a Funny Story, minus the suicidal-ness.)

Basically? It's pretty stinkin' terrifying.

At least I have Christ on my side to guide me. I mean, I can't imagine how people must feel who think they're going at it alone. The future might be fuzzy to my eyes, but geez, I've got the creator of the stinkin' universe on my side. If that doesn't up the level of confidence, I don't know what does.

"'For I know the plans I have for you,' declares the Lord. 'Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.'" Jeremiah 29:11

a couple clarifications: The Future Freaks Me Out is a song by Motion City Soundtrack, which is a pretty cool band. Check out Antonia by them; it's cute :)

oh, and It's Kind of a Funny Story is a pretty sweet book by Ned Vizzini that I've always liked a lot. Check it out, too.

I never thought I'd say this..

but I am so ready for SUMMER!

ugh, seriously, you have no idea how much I'd love to be lounging on a beach somewhere, toes drenched in sand and ocean and sun beating down on me.

but no such luck. :(

One of the main things I'm ready for is to be out of school. Don't get me wrong - I love school, always have. But I'm currently trying my hardest to stay awake and fight a losing battle with a headache while working on an annotated bibliography that I couldn't honestly care any less about if my life depended on it. To describe my mood in one world: blah.

I can't wait to not have to worry about assignments that are due or newspaper deadlines or the dreaded 7 AM annoyance of my alarm.

blahh.

brrr :(

see more Lolcats and funny pictures

Never thought I'd identify with a cat, but this is how I felt for the greater part of today. Stupid Mississippi weather: it's warm, it's cold, it's warm, it's cold. Just for the record, three quarter length sleeves do not elicit warm and coziness. :(

Other than that, though, my day kinda rocked. I have awesome friends ...who like to confuse the waiters at Mi Pueblo and then, in attempt to carry on a conversation with them in Spanish, end up telling them they have a green elephant.
uhhh...I guess you just had to be there, but it was funny, trust me.

Man, I'm tired. Off to bed I go! :)

let's talk about ...dating.

okay, goodness knows I am hardly some she-casanova with oodles (oodles...now there's a funny word. Wow, focus, Bre.) experience with boys under my belt, but I am a fairly normal sixteen year old girl and therefore have tried to dabble in the dating world a bit.
But in my minimal amount of experience, I've run into a few problems, to say the least. Did I mention I'm not good at any of this?
First of all, as much as I love my friends, I always keep in mind that I should take advice they give me on the particular subject with a grain of salt. Not that I don't trust them, but I don't consider myself the general sixteen year old, so I have problems with chasing after guys with the same approach that the average teenage girl would. Although most of them seem to know what they're doing, so perhaps I'm only setting myself up for failure.
This, however, opens up a whole 'nother can of worms. How do you judge whether someone is good at relationships? I mean, think about it. You have the one case where there's a single girl/guy/whatever who has had plenty of experience. What do they know? They haven't managed to tie anyone down and get married. (Think that episode of Sex and the City [yes, I watch it. don't judge me.] where Carrie has to lead the dating workshop and none of the women want to take her advice because she herself has never been married) On the other hand, think the episode of Roseanne where Jackie complains that Roseanne wouldn't know about dating and such because she's only ever been with Dan and married him. So if you can't listen to the single people, and you can't listen to the married people, who can you take advice from?! (Not that this is a huge problem for me; just an observation I've made. I think about stuff like this.)
My other issue is that it's just hard to get advice from adults because the world of dating is just so much different than it was for them. I mean, come on, you can't deny that it's changed dramatically, even in the last, say... five years. Now with the instant-ness of Facebook and Myspace (although apparently Myspace so isn't cool anymore) and Twitter and text messaging and you name it, the rules of dating and pursuing a partner have radically changed. I think the whole book on what to/what not to do needs to be rewritten to fit today's society. "Should I text him or wait and let him text me? Does that even matter? Is it weird that I'm Facebook stalking him? What's with his status? Is that about me?"
I'd write it, but uh...I don't know what I'm doing. Trust me, no one wants my advice.

So I've pretty much come to the conclusion that I'm going to have to play it by ear. And talk to God about it a whole, whole lot. That's my main source of comfort.
I particularly like the repeated phrase in Song of Songs: "Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires." I say it to myself as a reminder that God has someone out there for me, and He'll work it all out in His time. Which kind of rocks because, well...have I mentioned I suck at dating?