A Lack of Perspective

One of the hardest things in life is to remember that you, as a single, individual being on this heavily populated planet on which we live and breathe, are honestly not that important. Unless you are, say, the President, you and your issues are fairly minute compared to the rest of the world.
I think the people that have the hardest time swallowing this all too important life lesson are teenagers. When you're under the influence of the hormones and the stresses of high school and every other factor that weighs so heavily on adolescents' shoulders, you tend to feel like your problems and your situations are entirely unique and that their magnitudes are totally misunderstood by those around you.
But the thing is...the things we, myself most definitely included, tend to freak out over really don't matter that much. I know. Take a second; it is kind of surprising. Specifically when one considers the number of starving or homeless or hurting people in the world. If our goal as Christ followers is to serve Him, why do we stress over chemistry labs or whether or not you've moved from being just friends with a guy to "talking" to him? (I hate this term, just for the record. That, however, is a whole 'nother blog post for another day.) Why do we get so caught up in the trivial things that are right in front of us when there's a bigger, grander picture on the horizons?
What is it that we're missing out on while we're focusing on the here and now?
And more gravely, who aren't we reaching while we're so focused on ourselves?

Envisioning Ourselves

In my life lately, I've been trying to actually start growing up. I'm realizing that, even though seventeen still feels quite young to me, I'm about to have to graduate and get a job and enter the "real world." I'm kinda in limbo between being a kid and being an adult, and while it can be fun, most of the time it's just moderately scary.
So I figure if I'm about to be figuratively shoved out of the nest, I had better start getting ready. So, long intro coming to a close hopefully very soon, I've been asking God to help me mature and make me into the woman He wants me to be, along with surrendering control of said adulthood to him.
And in my process of attempting to mature, I've been noticing some things.
Tonight, for instance, upon running into an exboyfriend of mine in Wal-Mart (amazing how you can run into every single person you know while you're there. Small towns -sigh-) and hearing some of the not nicer things he had to say, I started thinking them over. (Just for the record, he wasn't, like, just flat out mean. Just a little condescending.) And then I started feeling dumb for even giving it a second thought.
And I started to realize something about myself. I let people get to me far easier than I'd like to think. I've always thought myself so tough, specifically emotionally, but I've been noticing it really isn't that hard to get in my head. So my tough guy image may not be so accurate after all.
So now I wonder, is it just me or does everyone fall victim to this? Do we all have a false image of ourselves ingrained so deeply into our minds that we fail to see who we really are?
This isn't the first time I've come to a conclusion such as this. There have been several times in my life when I've seen an aspect of myself burst forth that I didn't anticipate or even know existed.
So it causes me to wonder...
Are we lost in a world full of people, all with ideas of themselves different than they, themselves, really are?
And when it comes to our own identities, how truly clear is our vision?

I really hate chick flicks.

No, really. I do.

And not because I'm some cynical, love and romance and fairytale hating loner.

...not entirely anyway ;)

I think they're ridiculous. I think they put unfair standards on men and give women these unlikely and unrealistic expectations of what their "knight in shining armor" is supposed to say/do/be.

Now, don't get me wrong here, I'm certainly not some radical feminist. But I think it's sad how we like to put men up on pedestals and view them as things we need to attain. We idealize them and then get our hearts broken when they turn out to be, ya know, people. But that's what they are. As John Green says, "what a treacherous thing it is to think that a person is more than a person."

We're taught practically from the time we enter the world that we need to wear certain things and act certain ways to gain male attention. We focus so much of our time and thought on dating and how to win the next guy or nurse the current heartbreak. Even as we age and mature, society tells us to make plans for ourselves centering around the assumption that we'll be married as a twenty-something.

And so the media certainly isn't helping by shoving these images of the perfectly handsome, perfectly consistent, perfectly perfect prince in our faces constantly. It's just not fair.

And just not real. But then again what is real these days? So maybe it makes sense after all.

and I am just some big ole cynic. Eh, I'm okay with that. :)

long time, no see

fact: I've been ridiculously busy and have pretty much entirely neglected this blog. my bad!

Updates from the last time I posted:
-I went to Snowbird! If you want a better description of what Snowbird Wilderness Outfitters is, other than "The best stinkin' camp in the world!" as I would say, you should go here:
-I went tons of other places: Tallahassee to visit the sister and brother-in-law
Family picture time!


Orange Beach and Biloxi with my mom for business trips:
Mom and I picture time!


-I didn't have a computer for about a month, due to the fact that yet another laptop charger bit the dust (yeah, me and technology don't get along, unfortunately)

-I started my senior year. Which has been insanely fun and insanely exhausting all at once. These days, if it doesn't have to do with AP Chemistry or Trigonometry, I don't have a whole lot of time to think about it. Seriously. In the first month of school, we've already done two labs (labs = death) and two posters (posters = slightly less painful death, but death nonetheless).

-Oh yeah, and I hung out with this goober a whole lot, and by "a whole lot" I mean all the time:


All in all? Best summer ever. Life's pretty darn great, as of late. :)

look at this baby!

It takes a lot to make me go "awww!", being as I'm not the squishy, warm and fuzzy type person. But this video kinda makes me do that, and it kinda makes me want a baby, which I thought was previously impossible. I mean, not enough to seriously make it a life goal, but enough to make me consider it for a minute or two.

...

and then say NOPE! :)
Sorry, Mom. You want grandkids? Talk to your other daughter, who is actually married and not 16, I might add.

this town ain't big enough for the two of us ... literally

There are a couple things I like about living in small-town Mississippi. Granted, not that many, but some, nonetheless.
One of the more annoying of them, though, is that it's kinda hard to avoid people.

My best friend invited me to go hang out with her, her sister, and a few other people.

Little did I know, these "few other people" happened to include a certain ex-boyfriend of mine who I'm not on the best terms with (She didn't know either, just for the record. No crimes committed on her part).

So there I am bowling, eating, and just being within close proximity to this guy who, most of the time, I just wanted to kick really, really hard.

Granted, it wasn't nearly as bad as it could have been. Separate vehicles were taken, different lanes were bowled on. But still, being within ten feet of someone who you used to have feelings for and then were very hurt by is but one thing: AWKWARD.

And if you're wondering, no, we didn't speak to each other. We both did a pretty darn good job of pretending the other wasn't there. :|

Oh well. It was still fun. And I'm a horrible, horrible bowler, haha.

one of the best weekends of my life

was last weekend, bar none.
I've done lots and lots of Lay Renewals in my ten year-ish span of being a team member, but this one that took place last weekend has to be my favorite.
Why? I got the opportunity to worship and have an amazing time with the coolest, most amazing friend in the entire world.
Rachel was able to go with us, and we both had the best time praising and serving and spreading the Word. :)

Another really awesome thing was that I got to be a part of this:



Okay, so not that particular service, but we did the same thing. I can't watch it being done without getting major chill bumps, and it feels so cool to say that I was a part of that. (In case you're wondering, I painted a hand!)

It was pretty much awesome. :)