okay, goodness knows I am hardly some she-casanova with oodles (oodles...now there's a funny word. Wow, focus, Bre.) experience with boys under my belt, but I am a fairly normal sixteen year old girl and therefore have tried to dabble in the dating world a bit.
But in my minimal amount of experience, I've run into a few problems, to say the least. Did I mention I'm not good at any of this?
First of all, as much as I love my friends, I always keep in mind that I should take advice they give me on the particular subject with a grain of salt. Not that I don't trust them, but I don't consider myself the general sixteen year old, so I have problems with chasing after guys with the same approach that the average teenage girl would. Although most of them seem to know what they're doing, so perhaps I'm only setting myself up for failure.
This, however, opens up a whole 'nother can of worms. How do you judge whether someone is good at relationships? I mean, think about it. You have the one case where there's a single girl/guy/whatever who has had plenty of experience. What do they know? They haven't managed to tie anyone down and get married. (Think that episode of Sex and the City [yes, I watch it. don't judge me.] where Carrie has to lead the dating workshop and none of the women want to take her advice because she herself has never been married) On the other hand, think the episode of Roseanne where Jackie complains that Roseanne wouldn't know about dating and such because she's only ever been with Dan and married him. So if you can't listen to the single people, and you can't listen to the married people, who can you take advice from?! (Not that this is a huge problem for me; just an observation I've made. I think about stuff like this.)
My other issue is that it's just hard to get advice from adults because the world of dating is just so much different than it was for them. I mean, come on, you can't deny that it's changed dramatically, even in the last, say... five years. Now with the instant-ness of Facebook and Myspace (although apparently Myspace so isn't cool anymore) and Twitter and text messaging and you name it, the rules of dating and pursuing a partner have radically changed. I think the whole book on what to/what not to do needs to be rewritten to fit today's society. "Should I text him or wait and let him text me? Does that even matter? Is it weird that I'm Facebook stalking him? What's with his status? Is that about me?"
I'd write it, but uh...I don't know what I'm doing. Trust me, no one wants my advice.
So I've pretty much come to the conclusion that I'm going to have to play it by ear. And talk to God about it a whole, whole lot. That's my main source of comfort.
I particularly like the repeated phrase in Song of Songs: "Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires." I say it to myself as a reminder that God has someone out there for me, and He'll work it all out in His time. Which kind of rocks because, well...have I mentioned I suck at dating?
But in my minimal amount of experience, I've run into a few problems, to say the least. Did I mention I'm not good at any of this?
First of all, as much as I love my friends, I always keep in mind that I should take advice they give me on the particular subject with a grain of salt. Not that I don't trust them, but I don't consider myself the general sixteen year old, so I have problems with chasing after guys with the same approach that the average teenage girl would. Although most of them seem to know what they're doing, so perhaps I'm only setting myself up for failure.
This, however, opens up a whole 'nother can of worms. How do you judge whether someone is good at relationships? I mean, think about it. You have the one case where there's a single girl/guy/whatever who has had plenty of experience. What do they know? They haven't managed to tie anyone down and get married. (Think that episode of Sex and the City [yes, I watch it. don't judge me.] where Carrie has to lead the dating workshop and none of the women want to take her advice because she herself has never been married) On the other hand, think the episode of Roseanne where Jackie complains that Roseanne wouldn't know about dating and such because she's only ever been with Dan and married him. So if you can't listen to the single people, and you can't listen to the married people, who can you take advice from?! (Not that this is a huge problem for me; just an observation I've made. I think about stuff like this.)
My other issue is that it's just hard to get advice from adults because the world of dating is just so much different than it was for them. I mean, come on, you can't deny that it's changed dramatically, even in the last, say... five years. Now with the instant-ness of Facebook and Myspace (although apparently Myspace so isn't cool anymore) and Twitter and text messaging and you name it, the rules of dating and pursuing a partner have radically changed. I think the whole book on what to/what not to do needs to be rewritten to fit today's society. "Should I text him or wait and let him text me? Does that even matter? Is it weird that I'm Facebook stalking him? What's with his status? Is that about me?"
I'd write it, but uh...I don't know what I'm doing. Trust me, no one wants my advice.
So I've pretty much come to the conclusion that I'm going to have to play it by ear. And talk to God about it a whole, whole lot. That's my main source of comfort.
I particularly like the repeated phrase in Song of Songs: "Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires." I say it to myself as a reminder that God has someone out there for me, and He'll work it all out in His time. Which kind of rocks because, well...have I mentioned I suck at dating?
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ReplyDeleteBest advice always does come from Him! Sorry us "old folks" can't help more.
ReplyDeleteaw now "momma" you're not that old! ha! just kidding :)
ReplyDeleteYou know I value your opinion; it was just a thought.